You Forgot How Sexy (and Creepy) The Original Star Trek Was

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Star Trek: The Original Series

There is no shortage of Star Trek vs. Star Wars arguments to be had, but if we're basing the debate on which franchise is more libidinous, the winner is obvious. Star Wars has the Princess Leia bikini from Return of the Jedi and... that's it, unless your thing is furries, in which case that film, with both Chewbacca and Ewoks, tops Leia's golden top. Hey, no judgment. Now if we're extending that argument as to which iteration of Star Trek is, it's the original series, aka Star Trek: TOS, hands down. But not too far down. This is a family-friendly website, after all. They all have their space smut elements (I read somewhere that the worst job on board the Enterprise is the poor guy who has to mop up the Holodeck), but the bawdiness begins with Captain Kirk (William Shatner), Mr. Spock (Leonard Nimoy), and the rest of the OG crew.

For a series set in the 23rd century, there are elements of Star Trek: The Original Series that bear witness to the era in which it was made, and one of those elements is the costuming. Sure, the crew aboard the Enterprise look sharp in their Federation uniforms, and the red shirts look smashing, even perpetually smashed, but whoever cleared mini-skirts for the women to wear wasn't thinking with their head, or... nah, too easy. And clearly, the Federation has a "no-uggos" recruitment policy: every woman aboard the ship has a stunning set of gams to go with their comeliness.

Even the aliens they encounter are gorgeous, like the silver bikini-wearing drill thralls from "The Gamesters of Triskelion." Funny how these alien races are conveniently human in appearance, eh? That precedent is set from the start, with "The Man Trap," the first episode of the series. In it, Kirk, McCoy (DeForest Kelley), and Crewman Darnell (Michael Zaslow) beam aboard a planet to bring supplies to a research station, manned by Professor Robert Crater (Alfred Ryder) and Nancy (Jeanne Bal), his wife, someone McCoy knows well. It turns out Nancy is a shape-shifting alien and appears differently to each: Kirk as a Nancy the age she would be, McCoy as the Nancy he remembers, and to Darnell, a hot blonde. A hot blonde he met on a pleasure planet. And it's unlikely Darnell went to a pleasure planet to play Scrabble with a gorgeous babefest.

'Star Trek: The Original Series' Is Rife With Raunch

That's just one example. Throughout Star Trek: TOS, raunchy moments like these are abundant. In Season 2's "Mirror, Mirror," the oft-replicated idea of a mirror universe introduces that universe's ISS Enterprise, where the crew's roles are replicated by evil doppelgängers, except that universe has a "captain's woman" position, Marlena, played by Barbara Luna. And that position means making positions with the captain, wink wink. "Mudd's Women," the sixth episode of the first season, features three lovely ladies who distract all the males aboard the Enterprise. The iconic, seductive, green-skinned Orion slave girl features in three different episodes: "The Cage" and "The Menagerie," with the latter using the same footage of Susan Oliver from "The Cage," and in "Whom Gods Destroy," where Yvonne Craig (who played Batgirl in the Batman TV show) plays Marta, an inmate who tries to seduce — and kill — Kirk.

Two examples of sauciness in Star Trek: TOS are well-known to even those who aren't Trekkers: one of the first interracial kisses in television history, and a Vulcan mating ritual known as pon farr. The former happens in "Plato's Stepchildren," between Kirk and Uhura (Nichelle Nichols). The kiss courted controversy, airing only one year after interracial marriage was made legal by the U.S. Supreme Court. Interestingly, showrunners filmed an alternate take of the kiss, one where it happens off-screen, but Nichols recounts (per NBC News) that she and Shatner deliberately flubbed lines, forcing the original take to be used.

Pon farr, the aforementioned mating ritual, occurs in "Amok Time," the first episode of Season 2. Spock begins acting strange, which is attributed to the biological urges related to pon farr. Long story short, he needs to return to Vulcan, marry his betrothed, T'Pring (Arlene Martel), and get it on, or else he's toast. Only the voluptuous Vulcan vixen isn't interested in Spock, but has found another love. She invokes the kal-if-fee challenge, which involves Spock battling a champion of her choosing. She chooses Kirk. Oh, and it's a fight to the death, by the way. But everything works out, Spock's green blood goes back to his head... nah, still too easy. The allusion to puberty is clearly evident, and seeing Star Trek's two most prominent male characters in hand-to-hand combat is as subtle a nod to homoeroticism if ever there was one.

'Star Trek: The Original Series' Reputation Isn't Necessarily Fair

But is Star Trek: TOS's libidinous reputation fair? In spite of its leggy women, gorgeous aliens, getting-it-on galaxy style, and frequent beaming aboard, if you know what I mean, it actually isn't. For starters, Captain Kirk isn't the horndog he's long been thought of. He seduces many women over the course of the series, but not for lurid reasons. Kirk typically uses his charm to seduce women for the greater good, as a means to free himself, his crew, and/or his ship. That infamous interracial kiss wasn't romantic, but was forced by sadistic aliens using their telekinetic powers on them for their own amusement.

However, fair or not, Star Trek: TOS's lascivious legacy lives on. Pon farr is evident in the "mate or die" trope, and is parodied in the Futurama episode "Why Must I Be a Crustacean in Love?", with Dr. Zoidberg (Billy West) needing to return to his planet to mate. Futurama also has frequently parodied Kirk's reputation as a womanizer through Zapp Brannigan (West), the lustful 25-Star General for the Democratic Order of Planets whose uniform looks familiar to those worn by the crew of the Enterprise. The female crew, that is. And the Orion slave girl is a favorite go-to for cosplayers. Even episodes like "The Naked Now" from Star Trek: The Next Generation, where an infection aboard the ship lowers inhibitions (and leads to Tasha Yar (Denise Crosby) and Data (Brent Spiner) doin' the android nasty), is a sequel of sorts to the Star Trek: TOS episode "The Naked Time." So there you have it. If you want to see libido at warp speed, stick with the original.