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Hilary Duff Shares Sweet Selfie With Newborn Daughter Townes
Starring in A Cinderella Story would seemingly be quite the diamond in a mom's tiara when it comes to earning pop culture cred with her children.
But that's not how it works in Hilary Duff's household.
"My kids don't care about my work," the Lizzie McGuire alum told E! News in an exclusive interview, sharing that she was "pretty sure" her 12-year-old son Luca saw the 2004 classic at some point, but she hadn't sat down with daughters Banks, 6, and Mae, 3, for a screening. "They are big fans of me, but not of projects that they keep going back to. Maybe in time."
Meanwhile, Duff said, "I just try to have them be the stars of this household. That's really important to me."
And after welcoming daughter Townes in May, Duff and husband Matthew Koma are directing a sizable ensemble.
"It is very hard and very challenging," she acknowledged of having four kids in the house, including a 7-month-old baby, "and sometimes Matt and I just look at each other, and we're like, 'What did we do?'"
Koma did share in March that he had a vasectomy, so they are officially at capacity after having three girls together.
"But the fact is," added Duff, who shares Luca with ex-husband Mike Comrie, "we love our family so much. And moments like being at the Christmas tree lot—we play tag every year when we’re picking out our tree, and I'm wearing a baby and running through aisles of Christmas trees. Mae can play now, and she'll just wait and hide because she knows she's not as fast as everyone else. There's just a lot of joy."
Hilary Duff/Instagram
Then, of course, there was the time when all of them had the flu "and I was just crying myself to sleep every night," she noted, but that only makes her appreciate the good times even more.
And, she continued, when "we've woken up early and every single one of us has schlepped to the soccer field to watch Luca, and he scores a goal and everyone’s cheering for him, that's one of those moments where you're like, 'Oh.'
"We bit off a lot, but we can handle it, and it’s because our hearts are really full—and the house is really full and really loud—and for the most part it’s so good."
Frazer Harrison/Getty Images
And while her husband of five years is the most thoughtful of partners—"He is an amazing dad, and he 100 percent puts our family first"—Duff has also been turning to the thought partner that is Meta AI to keep her wits about her this holiday season.
So when she darts up in the middle of the night with an idea, "or I’m driving and there’s five thoughts fluttering in my head," the 37-year-old explained, "I'm rambling off to Meta AI and it's coming up with cohesive ways to help me tackle what I have to do on that day—or what I have to do next week, or who I’m buying presents for, and what those things are, or if I need to bring an appetizer. It's a big thought bubble that helps harness the chaos."
Even better, her Ray-Ban Meta Smart Glasses have helped her impress Luca when he kicks random soccer trivia her way.
"I can just cheat," Duff cracked, "and he thinks I'm so smart."
And though the actress' eldest child may be more curious about the celebrities she's met than how she got famous in the first place, he still thinks she's right for every role.
"I was just up for this job that I didn’t get, and he’s like, ‘Did you get the job?’" Duff shared. "And I was like, 'I didn't. And you know what, that was tough news, but it’s okay, and I’ve heard no my whole entire life, Luca. You hear yes a fraction of the time and you hear no so much, and I’m so strong and it’s totally fine.'"
To which the tween offered, "'You’re gonna get ‘em next time,'" Duff recalled. "And I'm like, 'I love you, you’re the best.'"
Hilary Duff/Instagram
She's also not the only one who thinks so.
"My 6-year-old is obsessed with him, and pretty hard on him," Duff said of Banks and Luca's sibling bond. "But it's really cute. And he's really good with the baby—he’s definitely not changing diapers or anything, but if she’s having a meltdown in the car, he's trying to soothe her. I’ve always said that about him, he's just all good inside."
She quipped, "The girls are the scary ones. I'm terrified of my 6-year-old right now."
But only because Banks is "so smart" and "so fast," the mommy-caliber subterfuge that used to suffice when she was younger no longer works.
"I can't trick you," Duff noted, "you're just going to figure it out too fast."
Though it may just now have dawned on Banks how much her mom's work means to some people.
"The fact that Sabrina Carpenter dressed up as Lizzie McGuire for Halloween," Duff said, referring to the "Espresso" singer sporting her signature character's iconic igloo dress this year, "Banks lost her mind. She was like, 'Why does she know who you are? Why does she even love you?!' That's what she said to me, it was amazing."
There are more hilarious, poignant, self-deprecating stories about motherhood where that came from. Read on for more of Duff's quotes on parenting:
Baby, Baby
The actress announced her third pregnancy, which marks her and Matthew's second child together. "We are growing!!! Mostly me," she cheekily shared on Oct. 24.
Stop Growing Up!
"My guys is getting an expander and starting 3rd grade!!!!!! SOS it's going too fast! Slow down the tape," she wrote on Instagram.
It Ain't Easy
"Just like you, I'm juggling a million things a day: working from home, changing diapers, and trying to navigate virtual learning. Sometimes my head is spinning and I truly have NO idea what's going on," she expressed. "And you know what? That's totally OK! We need to normalize not having it all together!!!"
Parent Drop Off Dilema
"Ok a few thoughts ... 100% real talk this is the first day I had two kids on my own on a school morning. Breastfeeding and making breakfast, getting 2 kids and myself dressed and packed and out the door while tripping over 4 dogs and feeding the damn fish was not easy. But I did it. And I'm proud of myself!" Duff wrote on this snap in January. "Im proud of every mom out there who MAKES IT FREAKIN HAPPEN. All day! Everyday! You are the shit! Bad ass, super goddess , world taker oner and you deserved to be praised❤️ ps laying outfits out for me baby and Luca was essential lol I even got 5 minutes to do some make up ..... then turned around to see Luca had used my lipstick as warrior paint on his face."
Relatable AF
"Calling all parents of colic babies.....this ends right? Can you ever set them down with out them screaming OR waking up?" Duff asked her fellow mom followers in January after dealing with a colic baby. "We have read everything the internet has to offer... nothing besides nursing basically every hour or less helps! We have done all the obvious things ..please leave magic tricks in comments. Oh and happy new year lol #thankGforfilters #babyforsale!!! #anytakers."
No Sleep Struggles
"We two months in sister. Been a lot of sleepless nights and you sure do scream a lot. But you are worth every moment my little strugglebunny," the Texas native shared about life with her new baby girl in December.
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Kids Are Game Changers
"Having kids changes everything. Life's not really about you anymore," the Younger star told MyDomaine in December. "Having kids has taught me unbelievable patience and brought immense joy to my life." The one thing she wished she knew before having kids however is how much sleep she'd actually be getting. "I would have stocked up on sleep like a bear hibernating in the winter," she joked.
Selfie Serious
"Don't get too get fancy very often these days. So I took a selfie to remember my old self ☺️... however the real thing to remember is that this tiny baby and spit up and sweat pants and not leaving the house is temporary and will actually be a phase that is gone too quickly❤️" Duff admitted on social media in December.
Balance Is Key
"I don't always balance it all, I do the best that I can, and some months are crazier than others," Duff told E! News in an exclusive interview in April. "I'm a mother first, so he's always my number one priority. And then my decision-making process is like, 'Hey can I make this work? Is he going to get enough of what he needs from me?'"
Pregnancy Has It's Positives
"I think that pregnancy really prepares you and gets you ready for motherhood, you never know exactly quite what to expect," the blonde beauty told Parade after having kids. "On the positive side of things, it's amazing. I really felt like my life literally grew and you don't even know it's possible. It's taught me a lot of patience and to slow down and don't let the days pass you by."
Worrying Is Part of the Game
"You're always worrying," Duff told Today about parenthood. "Everyone wants their kids' lives to go perfectly, which is obviously not possible all the time. But it's so fun. I'm so lucky."
Pregnancy Truths
While pregnant with her daughter Banks in July 2018, the actress revealed the truths about pregnancy on Instagram with this bikini bump snap. "The boobs are big the belly is big the body is big. Man.. pregnancy is hard. Giving love to all mamas who make it look effortless... this journey is hard as hell and also incredibly special," she shared. "Lovely to have a little life inside and to day dream of all the new adventures to come buuuut almost impossible to get my own shoes on..sick of getting up 9 times a night to pee and looking at this weird body in the mirror that is not my own at the moment. Women are so bad ass, this was just a note to remind myself and remind others how's strong and beautiful you are! WE GOT THIS!"
A Mother's Love
"Best thing that ever ever happened to me. I got the privilege of becoming a mother... and everyday I am grateful for his. #happymothersday to every mom out there that feels the same as I do," Duff wrote in 2017 for Mother's Day. "A mothers job is never done. But what a rewarding job it is❤️❤️."
Every Family Dynamic Is Unique
"I think it has to happen slowly. I can only speak for my family and I know how hard it is to introduce nontraditional ideas, but you have to do what feels right," Duff told Parents.com about trying to navigate co-parenting and a new family. "By the way, just because you are a parent doesn't mean that your needs aren't important. That was a big thing for me to get over through my whole experience of trying to stay a team and a family outside of some normalcy shifting. I feel really lucky that Luca has the dad that he does, we have the relationship that we do, and I didn't make any big decisions quickly like moving forward with my life or introducing another child or person. I took my time with everything and I think that was the best for me and for Luca. And watching what you say is key, key, key."
Motherhood Is a Gift
"This beautiful poem was given to me from the wonderful peter Herman who plays Charles on @youngertv I have to spend many days sometimes weeks away from luca when shooting and he gave me this poem when I was desperate to see and hold my boy," Duff shared along with a sweet poem in July 2017 admitting she missed her son. "Tears started falling down my face at the last four lines and still do when I read it. Motherhood is the greatest gift I have ever received. Everyday a new adventure or hurdle. My heart has grown bigger than I can explain. I think every mother or parent will find this poem as moving as I do ❤️enjoy."
Parenting Isn't Equal
When asked how important it is for Duff and her partner Matthew Koma to parent 50/50, the singer revealed that it is so not the case that mom and dad's responsibilities are split in half. "I don't believe in that; any mom would know that it's not 50/50. We have a way bigger responsibility always and forever," Duff told Parents.com. "I think it is important that they help in a different way that doesn't always pertain to the baby and the kid. I am a very proactive person and [Matt] is extremely helpful and I know he is going to be a natural but, in the beginning, the mom has most of the responsibility, so they have to pick up the slack in other areas."
Ari Perilstein / Getty Images for Feld Entertainment, Inc.
Mom Guilt Is Real
"I always feel torn or guilty about something. I'm not working right now, and at first I stressed about that, like, 'Oh, I shouldn't stay still this long.' And that's ridiculous. I have a child; it's totally fine to not be slammed all the time," she told RedBook in 2017. "It feels really good to not be on someone else's schedule — besides Luca's. I'm basically his chauffeur!"
Co-Parenting Sucks
"Some of my friends tell me, 'God, it must be so nice, you get a break from your kid because you share him.' I'm divorced, and it sucks," Duff told Redbook in 2017 about the truth about co-parenting with her ex Mike Comrie. "Well, it did suck for a while; now it's just normal. But it's true, I do get a break. I had Luca by myself for a few weeks, no help, when Mike was on the road, and when he got home I was like, 'He's yours! Bye!'"
Hilary Duff/Instagram
Haters Can Back Off
After posting this sweet snap from Disneyland in 2016, Duff took to Instagram to clap back at haters judging her kiss with her son Luca. "For anyone commenting that a kiss on the lips with my four year old is ‘inappropriate' go ahead and click a quick unfollow with your warped minds and judgement," she wrote.
Stop Judging, Please
"Even before you have your baby you can start feeling the judgment. Becoming a mother that whole process is so special and so magical really, but it's also very isolating," Duff told Entertainment Tonight in 2015 about all of the judgement a parent gets from others.
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