Pragmata’s Times Square is so superior to New York City's real hellscape

Anything’s better than tourists and bargain-bin Elmo

Pragmata, Capcom’s new sci-fi third-person shooter, is set on the moon, but a decent chunk of the early game takes place in New York City’s Times Square. Well, not the real Times Square, but a 3D-printed version using special moon-based technology. It’s very similar to the real thing, with yellow cabs populating its streets and gigantic billboards peering down at astronaut Hugh and android Diana. But there are some key differences that make it so much better than the one a short train ride away.

Ask any New Yorker about Times Square, and they will sneer in disgust. No one who lives in the city goes there willingly, unless the AMC on 42nd Street is the only one showing a new film you want to catch at the only time you’re available. Instead, we scuttle around beneath Times Square, too cautious and experienced to show our noses in the tourist trap. Traveling to Times Square is often a requirement for getting elsewhere in the city, as so many of the MTA’s major train lines intersect there.

Why do we detest going to Times Square? Tourists. So many tourists. Obviously, tourists are unavoidable in New York — over 65 million flocked to NYC last year — but they gather en masse in Times Square to gawk at advertising, buy overpriced chocolate at the M&M store, and take the same pictures for Instagram that everyone else takes for Instagram.

Contrast that with the streets of Pragmata’s lunar Times Square. There’s nary a soul in sight. Hugh and Diana can wander around without worry of being caught in a tourist’s selfie or being blasted with Jay-Z and Alicia Keys’ “Empire State of Mind,” which is inexplicably playing at all times on 42nd Street. They do have to worry about killer robots controlled by a rogue AI, I guess, but, I don’t know, man. I bet those robots at least know how to correctly walk on the sidewalk.

Pragmata’s Times Square is also so much cheaper than the real thing. There’s an advertisement for a specialty spicy BBQ burger that costs $5.99. I don’t know where in New York you can get a burger for five bucks, but it certainly ain’t Times Square. Instead, you can get overpriced microwaved pasta at Olive Garden, because of course there’s an Olive Garden in Times Square.

At one point, Hugh comments about how the moon is too clean and how he likes a little mess in his life. Sorry, Space Dad Hugh, but I’m going to have to disagree there. Have you been to Times Square, Hugh? Or just anywhere in New York? This is the city that never sleeps, except when it drunkenly vomits on a seven-foot-tall pile of trash bags and then passes out. I’m OK with how pristine the moon is. We’re going to dirty it with robot guts, anyway.

Jokes aside, Pragmata’s Times Square works so well because it resets expectations for what the game’s environments are going to be like. After Hugh and Diana cross paths, the first main level of the game takes place in hallways and research rooms throughout the lunar base. They’re all white, pristine, and homogenous, and you’d be forgiven if at this point you’re expecting the entire game to take place in a series of same-y hallways.

Then Pragmata takes you to its version of New York City, and blows open any expectations. Suddenly we’re dodging in between taxis, some misprinted and blended with the street. We’re (very inelegantly) platforming on rooftops and in between buildings. We’re waltzing into a diner to check out its menu.

By 3D printing Times Square on the moon, Pragmata flexes its creative muscles. The next level is just as surprising: you’ll wander through a constructed forest. Future levels aren’t quite as unexpected, but still inviting. Don’t worry — you do get to hop around on the moon’s surface at some point.

Level design is just one of Pragmata’s strengths, which are headlined by the unique hacking-infused gameplay. In my review, I noted how Pragmata reinvigorates an age-old genre (and looks like I’m not alone). It also nails letting me enjoy a part of my home that I’d otherwise avoid at all costs. There’s only so many times a man can hear “concrete jungle where dreams are made of” as Optimus Prime and Elmo take selfies with tourists.