What It's Really Like to Stay at Bravo's "Love Hotel"

When I arrived at Grand Velas Boutique hotel in Los Cabos, there were no flipped tables, no one's husband in the pool, and not a single prosthetic leg found on a beach chair. I didn't see any shattered wine glasses or hear whispered accusations about somebody named Tom. In fact, there was no evidence at all that some of Bravo's most iconic housewives had been there just months earlier to film "Love Hotel."

For those unfamiliar with the network's newest dating experiment, "Love Hotel" follows Shannon Beador, Luann de Lesseps, Gizelle Bryant, and Ashley Darby on their quest for love (. . . or at least the coochie tingles, as Ashley says). But the Grand Velas Boutique hotel is so much more than the show's production backdrop: It's actually an idyllic vacation spot.

With pink bougainvilleas covering the property and a direct view of the Sea of Cortez, the sights are only part of what makes this all-inclusive boutique so luxurious. The luxury really comes from the service — the type that only a Bravo housewife could expect.

Of course, I've always wanted to live the life of a Bravo housewife. I've even had my own personal tagline saved in my notes forever: "I don't believe in ghosting people, but if you use the wrong form of 'your,' I might have to start." (Andy, call me when you're ready to produce The Real Housewives of Kansas City.) So when Grand Velas Boutique hotel invited me to come live my best Bravo housewife life, I asked how soon I could be there.

About Grand Velas Boutique Los Cabos

How I Vacationed Like a Real Housewife at the "Love Hotel"

When the housewives on "Love Hotel" aren't fighting over Ralph, getting their birth charts read by an astrologer, or shaming their dates for not enjoying vegetables, they're eating, drinking, and lounging – also my favorite things to do on vacation. Fortunately for me, Grand Velas Boutique specializes in all three.

Let's start with the culinary experiences. The Grand Velas Boutique hotel offers a morning breakfast buffet at Del Mar, some light snacks at 51 Bar, a robata grill at Loto for dinner, poolside lunch options, and a sit-down lunch experience at Roca. (Grand Velas, the sister resort next door, also offers more dining experiences that guests can enjoy free of charge, including the Michelin-star restaurant Cocina de Autor).

Though the show doesn't focus too much on where the housewives ate on property, I aimed to eat like Luann: Not only does she tend to start her mornings with a green juice in hand, but she also participated in an oyster and champagne tasting experience in the first episode. The green juice, made of orange juice, apple, spinach, celery, and parsley, was a refreshing way to start my mornings. And though I'm not the biggest fan of oysters, I enjoyed trying some of the specialty oysters prepared by chef Jose Varona later in the day, which were paired with a sparkling rosé.

When I needed something sweet, I attended a chocolate and tequila pairing class led by the hotel's food and beverage manager Miguel Cuevas. I didn't make the chocolate myself like Ashley and Wale did on their date, but I did learn that I now have an affinity for cacao and 1921 Crema de Tequila.

This brings me to the next part of vacation: the drinking. Alcohol, of course, is a huge part of both Mexican and Bravo housewife celebrations. During a cocktail making class with mixologist Israel Osorio, I learned how to smoothly sip tequila (one look to the left side of my body, one look to the right side) and also how to give my drink a smoky flavor. Gizelle and her man Jay also dabbled in a tequila tasting on the show, and, similar to her, I also felt rich. (Gizelle, I agree this was rich bitch walking at its finest.)

Last but not least, lounging was a big part of this vacation. On the show, the four housewives hang out in beach chairs and talk about their dating prospects. (Eh, more so how they plan to help their girl Shannon, but that's neither here nor there.) And while I wasn't there to date anyone, I did enjoy these comfy community spaces. My favorite spots were the pool chairs or, like the housewives, around the fire pit.

Now even though I was on vacation, I love some gym time. There's nothing like sweating out the tequila from the night before. So yes, I channeled all the ladies when I took some time to run on the treadmill and do some yoga in the 24-hour gym. Unlike the housewives though, I wasn't working out with any sexy silver foxes.

Is the Grand Velas Boutique Hotel Worth the Trip?

Not a Bravoholic like myself? The Grand Velas Boutique hotel is still a five-star hotel for a reason. Though it's a considerable expense, the service is top tier. From the pool waiters remembering my drink order every afternoon to Israel crafting up new cocktails for me to try just because, the staff was what made this vacation so particularly memorable. Eating at a Michelin-star restaurant and participating in a seven-step "water ceremony" at the SE Spa really topped off the whole vacation vibes, too.

But of course, if you are a Bravo viewer, then there's even more reason to visit. Because even though you may not be there at the same time as the housewives, you can still vacation like them with some of the same "Love Hotel" experiences. And because there aren't actually any cameras around, there's no "Bravo, Bravo, fucking Bravo," necessary.

Travel and expenses for the author were provided by Grand Velas Boutique hotel for the purpose of writing this story.

Taylor Andrews (she/her) is the balance editor at PS, specializing in topics relating to sex, relationships, dating, sexual health, mental health, travel, and more. With seven years of editorial experience, Taylor has a strong background in content creation and storytelling. Prior to joining PS in 2021, she worked at Cosmopolitan.