Melbourne influencers Tash and Marcus O'Brien have spoken about the devastating loss of their first child, a baby boy named Billy.
The couple, who are both bodybuilders, had been preparing to welcome their son after what Tash described as a 'perfect pregnancy the whole way through'.
But after a series of agonising events surrounding her induction, their hopes of meeting Billy alive were shattered.
Now, as they navigate the aftermath of their loss, Tash and Marcus have spoken about the heartbreak of saying goodbye.
Speaking to Daily Mail on Wednesday, personal trainer Tash explained that her pregnancy had been low-risk and closely monitored through a midwife program, which involved regular appointments and ultrasounds.
At 38 weeks, she asked whether she could be induced because she felt she would be more reassured having her baby outside the womb.
Melbourne bodybuilding couple Tash and Marcus O'Brien have spoken about the devastating loss of their first child, a baby boy named Billy
The couple had been preparing to welcome their son after what Tash described as a 'perfect pregnancy the whole way through'. But after a series of agonising events surrounding her induction, their hopes of meeting Billy alive were shattered. (The couple are pictured with Billy)
'I just needed him out,' she recalled. 'I felt that I could keep him safer on the outside.'
The couple were initially told an induction could not be arranged until 41 weeks.
At their appointment on the Monday of that week, Tash explained that she was struggling to feel Billy's movements as he grew bigger.
Doctors checked the baby and found that he was moving happily, before booking the induction for Saturday.
But Tash said she felt unsettled after returning home and contacted her midwife about bringing the appointment forward.
The following morning, she received a call offering an induction on Thursday, with delivery expected on Friday.
Her usual midwife would not be there, but the couple decided to proceed.
'We trust that these other midwives, they've been doing it a long time, it'll... let's just get him out,' Tash said.
Tash is pictured at her baby shower
Tash attended the hospital on the Thursday for an induction, and noted that Billy was alive and well on the monitor at the time.
However, during the insertion of the balloon catheter, Tash and Marcus became concerned as several midwives went back and forth discussing how much water to use.
'We were told the balloon was so safe, so safe,' Marcus said.
Tash said she experienced significant cramping after the balloon was inserted, although staff told her Billy was fine. She also noticed blood coming from the tube attached to the balloon.
When she reported the bleeding, she said she was told it was normal spotting and was sent home.
Tash recalled being in excruciating pain after arriving home.
Later that evening, blood again gushed from the tube and ran down her leg.
She called the midwife who had inserted the balloon and reported both the bleeding and her pain.
Tash said she feels 'extremely let down' by the midwives and doctors who treated her during the induction
According to Tash, she was told the symptoms were normal and that the blood was acceptable as long as it was coming through the tube.
'I feel extremely let down,' she said.
That night, Tash remained on the couch because she did not want to go to bed until she felt her baby move.
She said she was gently poking her belly and talking to Billy, asking him to give her a sign that he was okay.
At around 9pm, he kicked. 'So I was like, okay, so I have to go to bed,' she recalled.
The next morning, Tash told Marcus she had not really felt Billy move.
She wondered whether the cramping was distracting her from his movements, but was eager to get back to hospital and have him checked.
After arriving at the hospital, Tash asked a midwife to check Billy before beginning the routine preparations for the induction.
Tash and Marcus shared this heartbreaking AI photo featuring the couple cradling Billy with Jesus by their side
The midwife attempted to find his heartbeat but nothing could be heard. Another midwife was called in, followed by two doctors with an ultrasound machine.
The scan confirmed that Billy had died.
'It's like the most devastating moment of my life,' Tash said.
After the heartbreaking news, the couple spent several hours waiting before Tash underwent a caesarean section.
Later, the couple were able to see Billy.
'He absolutely looks perfect,' Tash said. 'You could tell that he hadn't been gone for long. Literally just like he's sleeping.'
The couple spent the next four days in hospital with their son.
'We got to give him as much love as we possibly could,' Tash said.
The couple have been connected with counselling and Red Nose, while Marcus's family has organised a GoFundMe campaign to help cover Billy's funeral
But after Billy was taken for his autopsy, the couple returned home.
'We came home to an empty house,' Tash said.
Tash and Marcus have raised concerns about the care Tash received during the induction and the advice she was given after reporting pain and bleeding.
They said they are awaiting the autopsy and coroner's report before deciding whether to pursue any legal action.
'If we find that there's evidence that I should have been more supported, then it's maybe something that we will look into,' Tash said.
'But at the moment, we're just trying to get through day by day.'
The couple have been connected with counselling and Red Nose, while Marcus's family has organised a GoFundMe campaign to help cover Billy's funeral.
They are also being supported by Tash's usual midwife, who she described as 'absolutely incredible'.
Tash and Marcus are award-winning bodybuilders
Despite the heartbreak, the couple said they have been overwhelmed by the support they have received since sharing Billy's photographs.
'It's been overwhelmingly good,' Marcus said.
For Tash, however, the pain remains raw.
'Even if it was going to happen, if they got me in and I was checked, I would feel so much more reassured knowing that it happened while I was at the hospital, and there was nothing they could do. But I wasn't even checked,' she said.
As they wait for answers, Tash and Marcus are facing the unimaginable task of grieving a baby they had spent months preparing to meet.
'We're broken,' Marcus said. 'We're honestly just so, so heartbroken.'

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