She Shared Her Breast Cancer Journey With Millions — Here's What She Learned

Health is a deeply personal topic. For most of us, it's something we navigate privately, which means a lot of questions are left unanswered, shrouded in fear. But talking about our health openly and honestly can help us feel less alone, establish community, and give others hope when they need it most. On social media, though, it also leaves you vulnerable to opinionated commenters, unsolicited medical advice, and harsh criticism.

This duality is something Leila Esmaeili understands well. At just 30 years old, she reached across her chest and found a quarter-size mass near her right breast. As a dermatology physician assistant, she knew it didn't feel like a cyst or a benign fatty tumor, so she quickly got an ultrasound before having the mass removed and sent to pathology for a biopsy. The initial ultrasound looked fine, and she went into her 31st birthday feeling relieved. It wasn't until after the biopsy came back that she was diagnosed with triple-negative breast cancer (TNBC) on Jan. 23, 2024.

"When I got diagnosed, I was like, 'Oh my gosh, I have to share this with the world,'" Esmaeili tells PS. The surprise of the diagnosis was her main motivator, but she also knew that — as a medical provider herself — she'd be comfortable detailing her breast cancer journey in ways others might not.

"Before I got my diagnosis, I didn't really post much," Esmaeili says. She had three posts on Instagram and only downloaded TikTok after her diagnosis. She started by sharing the news on Instagram and received overwhelming support from her immediate circle. She then posted her diagnosis story to TikTok, where she reached an additional 1.5 million internet strangers. Viral cold-capping videos came next, along with chemotherapy details, surgery updates, and candid check-ins.

"It started picking up and being like, 'Oh, so this isn't just people that know me that want to support me,'" Esmaeili says. She didn't follow many people on #CancerTok in the beginning ("I found that it would scare me," she says), but social media made it easier for her to navigate such an aggressive type of breast cancer. "I met a lot of women that were in the breast cancer community," she says. "If I would ever post a question, I got an answer in two seconds."

Esmaeili says that chronicling her breast cancer journey online has been an overwhelmingly positive experience. But that's not to say she's avoided internet trolls altogether. "When you share something like that with the world, you open up the door for opinions. And let me tell you, any opinion that's off track [with] what you're already doing just freaks you out," she says.

When she does encounter negativity online (and thankfully, it's rare), her best advice is to block the person and move on. "Every so often I'll have someone say something stupid like, 'Chemo will kill you. Just eat kale,' and I just block them," she says.

It isn't fun, but Esmaeili will deal with an occasional off-putting comment if it means raising awareness about TNBC. "I was barely 31 years old and I didn't have any family history. I was that girl that was meal prepping and working out and all this stuff," she says. Her story helps people understand that breast cancer can truly affect anyone at any time.

Posting about breast cancer gives some patients an outlet and a stronger sense of community. But in many cases, it also gives back to the people watching. "The biggest thing when it comes [down to it] is the 'why,'" Esmaeili says. And for her, it's all about trying to prevent others from feeling the same kind of shock and fear she once did.

"Something horrible happened to me and I wanted to make something good come out of it," she says. "And that was: how can I make this less scary and easier for the people that come after me?"

Chandler Plante (she/her) is an assistant health and fitness editor for PS. She has over four years of professional journalism experience, previously working as an editorial assistant for People magazine and contributing to Ladygunn, Millie, and Bustle Digital Group.