Michael Bay's unwatchable TMNT movies at least got one thing right

But, like, only one thing

The 2014 film Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and its 2016 sequel Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows are still the worst-ever takes on the Ninja Turtles franchise. As a die-hard TMNT devotee, I try hard to find something to like about every iteration, but I still can’t stomach the two Michael Bay-produced movies, which reimagined the characters with hulking, hard-to-look-at designs. Both films were also thinly-plotted action-fests akin to Bay’s Transformers movies, featuring little of the brotherly relationship between the Turtles that has defined their success. That said, the latter film, which is now turning 10, did get one thing right: It delivered an utterly perfect portrayal of cartoon goons Bebop and Rocksteady, fulfilling a 25-year-old dream for TMNT fans.

In the original 1987 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles animated series, Bebop and Rocksteady began as a couple of human street punks working with the Shredder on menial tasks, like threatening TV reporter April O’Neill when she covers his criminal activities. But in the second episode, the Shredder mutates the two of them using some mutagen and DNA from a couple of stolen zoo animals. Thus Bebop becomes a mutant warthog and Rocksteady a mutant Rhinoceros.

Throughout the animated series, Bebop and Rocksteady serve as the dim-witted, accident-prone employees of Shredder and Krang, a bickering villain duo bent on world domination. Bebop and Rocksteady, however, don’t seem to share their bosses’ lofty ambitions. They’re frequently depicted as just wanting to play video games, read comic books, and eat junk food. Their slacker desires are also what made them beloved by TMNT fans, as did their brotherly bond. The closeness of their friendship was always the most endearing thing about the characters. Despite being villains, Bebop and Rocksteady are BFFs, and their bro-ship is only strengthened by Shredder’s ever-abusive insults towards them. The dynamic made Bebop and Rocksteady seem less like supervillains and more like two friends stuck in a toxic workplace.

That’s precisely the dynamic in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows. At the beginning of the film, the duo are nothing more than a couple of thrill-seeking, back-slapping street punks hired by the Shredder as errand boys. He then mutates them and, despite being turned into horrible monsters, they’re thrilled with the upgrade as it’ll only allow them to cause more destruction. From there, the Shredder uses Bebop and Rocksteady to hunt down the Turtles, and while they do follow orders, they seem much more focused on playing with the army tank they get their hands on. In maybe their best moment in the whole film, the two indulge in a pair of steel drums full of spaghetti, and the scene ends with Rocksteady slapping Bebop’s sizable belly.

Bebop was portrayed by funnyman Gary Anthony Williams, while Rocksteady was brought to life by the wrestler Sheamus. They both nailed their characters, thanks, in part, to their incredible onscreen chemistry. For Turtle fans, finally seeing these two brutes on the big screen was a huge treat, especially after 1991’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Secret of the Ooze saw the Shredder create two other mutants instead with Tokka and Rahzar. While those characters are now loved in their own right for nostalgia reasons, Bebop and Rocksteady are much more essential to the TMNT fandom.

Too bad that two such spot-on performances live in a movie that’s otherwise very difficult to enjoy. While those movies utterly botched the Turtles, Shredder, April and every other character they adapted, it serves to wonder how Michael Bay got Bebop and Rocksteady so right.

Then again, the problem with Bay’s TMNT movies is that they’re fairly brainless action movies, and when it comes to Bebop and Rocksteady, brainlessness is the not-so-secret sauce.