Married At First Sight's Rachel Gilmore reveals the heartbreaking reason she almost didn't appear on the show and why she only went on two dates a year before the experiment

Married At First Sight's Rachel Gilmore has revealed that her deep insecurities about her appearance almost stopped her from signing up to the controversial experiment.

Speaking to Daily Mail following her wedding to Steven Danyluk, Rachel, 34, explained she entered the show carrying years of self-doubt shaped by rejection, long periods of being single and a painful situationship that left her feeling unwanted.

Putting herself on the show was not a decision Rachel took lightly.

'It is extreme,' she admitted. 

'I would maybe go on one or two dates a year because they would absolutely obliterate me. I'd be like, "I can't do this," then I'd wait another 12 months and try again.'

Rachel said the cycle left her emotionally exhausted and questioning her worth.

'Nothing would change. I'd go on a couple of dates and end up back in the same place,' she said. 

Despite her warm personality and openness to love, Rachel said she has never felt like society's idea of the 'perfect' woman, something that haunted her as she prepared to walk down the aisle to a stranger.

'I'm not a size six woman. I'm not tanned and panned,' she said. 

'I'm just an average girly pushing a solid five on a good day.'

That fear followed her right into her wedding day.

Rachel admitted one of her biggest concerns entering the experiment was whether her groom would be disappointed by her appearance.

'That was a massive fear for me,' she said. 

'I was really concerned that Steven was disappointed in who he'd been matched with.'

Those insecurities surfaced almost immediately after the ceremony when Rachel felt she was not receiving the reassurance she needed. 

'I complimented him straight away. For me, it's your wedding day. Complimenting your bride is the bare minimum,' she said.

Watching the episode back only intensified those feelings.

'It did seem like Steven was quite disinterested, which hurt to watch,' Rachel admitted.

Rachel said the lack of verbal affirmation triggered old wounds formed after years of feeling overlooked in dating.

'I need verbal reassurance and action. Words and behaviour have to align,' she said. 'If they don't, it creates questions.'

Her vulnerability was laid bare in what she described as an uncomfortable but necessary conversation with Steven at the reception.

'I felt needy bringing it up, but I had to express my needs. We're diving headfirst into a relationship,' she said.

While the moment was confronting, Rachel said Steven ultimately reassured her and took responsibility for how his nerves may have come across.

'I watched him beat himself up a bit, which was really sad,' she said. 'But it ended up being a really nice moment for us.'

Rachel also addressed the moment that quickly went viral online - her uncontrollable laughter as she walked down the aisle.

'I was cringing watching myself back,' she admitted. 

She explained the laugh was a nervous reflex rather than confidence.

'I walked down the aisle, saw Steven and thought, "This is my husband." Then there was this awkward silence and I just couldn't stop laughing. I knew it was awkward and still couldn't control it.'

Despite the nerves, Rachel said she was immediately attracted to Steven.

'He looked so handsome in his blue suit,' she said.

Away from the wedding, Rachel said the hen's night was a rare moment of joy and belonging.

'I had the biggest smile. Walking into a room full of incredible women and thinking, 'I get to do this with them,' was amazing,' she said.

As the season unfolds, Rachel hopes viewers see more than the awkward moments.

'I care a lot about people. I'm a big empath. But I'll also call out bad behaviour. Staying silent makes you complicit,' she said.

While she remained tight-lipped about what unfolds next with Steven, Rachel hinted the journey ahead will challenge her fears head-on.

'There's no spoilers. You'll just have to watch,' she laughed.